Bill Russell Knows

Well, Bill Russell told Kevin Garnett that he thinks KG will win two to three championships with the Celtics.

One down, who knows to go.

After such a great playoff in the NBA, I just wanted to share a few things I noticed about our, now world champions, the Boston Celtics. More specifically, the BIG 3.

Lets start off with Paul Pierce. First of all, the good. He basically ruled the finals despite me calling Kobe eating his lunch. However that whole knee thing was crap. Total crap. As you all, or as all of you who care to know, know, I messed up my knee pretty good at school last semester, was basically out of sports commission for a month or so and I put on less of a show than he did.

Another thing...that facial hair, reminiscent of a pre-pubescent teen has to go. I know, I am the last person that should talk, but as a facial-hair deprived young man, I know when to get rid of the little scruff I have. I mean this kid is 12 years old and he's more adequately equipped than both Mr. Pierce and I.

All in all, Paul, congrats for finally getting your ring, but if you are as great as everyone is saying you are, why did it take two more hall of famers to finally bring the Championship back to Boston?


Now its Kevin Garnett's turn. I have always been a tremendous fan of Kevin Garnett. He basically carried his Timberwolves team every year (to where I won't say but he carried them there) and always seemed like a great role model. Funny thing is, for such a great role model, his trademark term "Mother F***er" is insanely funny. While we were watching a game together, Chris pointed out that KG always says this, then, promptly on schedule, Mr. Garnett dunked on Lamar Odom and subsequently said something along the lines of "Bring it, Mother...".

Towards the end of game 6 in the Finals, you saw KG on the sidelines cheering as his scrub counterparts were bringing the game to a close and, right on cue, you see him wave his arms and yell "come on mother f...ers". HILARIOUS.

So congrats to you too Kevin, I am really glad you won. But next time (which I'm sure there will be) lets be a little bit more under control in your post game interview. (Edited MF included)

And Mr. Ray-Ray Allen, you're up. As your team mates said, "shoot the *beep*". Glad to see you picked up your game as the playoffs went on and I'm glad your father's trial went well and he can rest easy now that he doesn't have to deal with it any longer. Good work on rounding out the Big 3 this year. I'm happy for you and your getting traded into one of the best situations in the whole league.

What I want to get to is your calves. How? Are they even real, or are those implants? I dunno much about you other than you are silky smooth, you have a sweet shot and your calves are insane.

Get back to me about how to get those springs behind your knees. Oh and way to give one of the most classic "wtf are you doing" looks to your owner when he hoisted the Finals trophy high into the air and then realized that he would stand on something to get it up even higher. Anyone who saw the award ceremony probably knows what I'm talking about.